Money For Nothing

Today’s Supreme Court ruling finding Obamacare Constitutional as a tax reminds me of this routine done by Politizoid.

The ‘What A Maroon’ Award

And now, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for ... This week’s “What A Maroon” award goes to...

RACHEL MADDOW

The gaffe-prone left-wing MSNBC maven may not always know what she’s talking about, but she says it with such a straight face. In her latest foray into punditry, Maddow reveals she is clueless as to the meaning of the word “controversial.”

She expressed shock that the highly partisan senate unanimously confirmed the appointments of Leon Panetta as Secretary of Defense and Gen. David Petraeus as head of the CIA.

She called both appointments “controversial” and “unpopular with the public.”



“Controversial” and “unpopular with the public”? Really, Rachel? I seriously doubt the average American could even name the heads of Defense and CIA. And of those who can, I suspect the vast majority approve of Panetta and Petraeus.

It seems her definition of “controversial” is anything with which she disagrees and “unpopular with the public” is what her limited circle of acquaintances and fellow travelers at the MSNBC studios dislike.

Rachel needs to get out more.

WHAT A MAROON!

In honor of the great American philosopher Bugs Bunny who first coined the phrase, I’ve decided to present the “What a Maroon” award periodically to the politician, organization or celebrity who makes the most sand-poundingly stupid statement of recent days.

The ‘What A Maroon’ Award

And now, ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for ... This week's “What A Maroon” award goes to...

SEN. BARBARA BOXER

The senator is outraged, outraged that dastardly Republicans are even thinking about trimming the bloated federal budget. The GOP, the left-wing Democrat shrilly asserts in her own special way, is on a “V-E-N-D-E-T-T-A”!

That’s right, a vendetta, a “vendetta against health care” and a “vendetta against clean energy.” But there was even worse to come, as she made the most frightening accusation of all — Republicans, she said, have a “vendetta against Elmo.”

Elmo’s afraid!

True, House Republicans did vote to defund public broadcasting, although it’s blatantly left-wing bias probably had more to do with it than a kid’s show. But the good senator has always been adept at demonizing her opponents and skirting inconvenient truths.

“Vendetta against Elmo,” indeed!

WHAT A MAROON!

In honor of the great American philosopher Bugs Bunny who first coined the phrase, I’ve decided to present the “What A Maroon” award each week to the politician, organization or celebrity who makes the most sand-poundingly stupid statement of recent days.

Attention, Democrats!

The foolish voters have rejected your message and put Republicans in power. What's a good, left-wing, progressive lawmaker to do when you can't pass legislation favoring your special interest groups, or worse when there's pending legislation mandating that your friends in organized labor should pay their fair share for their own health care coverage and pensions?

Sometimes, you just have to get away from it all, especially if it shuts down government and at least temporarily blocks offending legislation. But where to go?

Ask no more.

Rockford, Illinois, is waiting for you!

Your Friendly Liberal, Neighborhood Ku Klux Klan

The crocodile tears keep falling for the late Sen. Robert Byrd of West Virginia. The longest-serving member of the U.S. Senate, Byrd is being eulogized for many things by his supporters in the Democrat party.

Of course, his past affiliation with the racist and terrorist Ku Klux Klan are being...excuse the metaphor...whitewashed. At least former President Bill Clinton did talk about it, excusing is merely a ploy to get elected.

Be that as it may, the KKK was a horrible organization and a stain on our nation's past.

However, that makes it fair game for political humor satire. The '60s folk group the Mitchell Trio sang about them in a number titled "Your Friendly Liberal, Ku Klux Klan." FYI, the tenor in the group is the late John Denver.

The ‘What a Maroon’ Award

In honor of the great American philosopher Bugs Bunny, who first coined the phrase, I've decided to present the "What a Maroon" award each week to the politician or celebrity who makes the most sand-poundingly stupid statement of the week.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Democrat County Supervisor Peggy West of Milwaukee who supports Milwaukee's boycott of Arizona because she thinks Arizona does not share a border with Mexico.



What a Maroon!

‘Come to the USA’

Comedic songster Ray Stevens has some thoughts on the illegal immigration debate.

ZOMBIES!!!

Beware! They walk among us!

Fashion Statement

We Need a Gas Tax

Gas emissions are degrading the environment and generally making life miserable for people. Methane, hydrogen, sulfur, methanethiol, dimethyl sulfide and hydrogen sulfide are just a few of the byproducts released into the atmosphere each and every day by irresponsible people.

There is a growing sentiment that taxes should be used to curtail antisocial behavior, such as smoking or alcohol consumption. That being the case, we should start heavily taxing the causes of gas pollution ... vegetables!

One of the great unspoken truths is that vegetarians in general and vegans in particular are flatulent. Oh, they’ll deny it, just as the little girl with crumbs on her face will solemnly deny that she raided the cookie jar, despite empirical evidence to the contrary. Anyone who has spent any time around vegetarians knows this to be true.

I used to work at a newspaper where about half the staff were vegetarians. Our daily editorial budget meetings resembled the bean-eating scene in “Blazing Saddles.”

In particular, I remember our photo editor. The guy was a talented photographer with a keen eye and a wiz in the darkroom. He was also a strict vegan. I always knew when he entered a room because I could smell him. If my daily meetings with him were uncomfortable, the times I had to be in the tiny, enclosed darkroom with him were nightmares.

So, it’s time to take a stand against the planet-destroying practice of vegetarianism! We must urge our lawmakers to levy a “gas tax” on vegetables such as beans, peas, corn, cucumbers, green peppers, kohlrabi, onions and leeks, radishes, rutabaga and turnips and vegetarian restaurants before it’s too late!

You Might Be A Liberal If ...

I wish I could claim credit for this, but it’s originally from “Acrimony,” a blogger in the Palm Springs, Calif., area. He really hit the nail on the head.

You might be a liberal if...


You hate Fox News because its biased, and wish there were a liberal channel just to make it fair.

You know Medicare is losing billions, and you want EVERYONE in America to have it.

You think meat is bad for you, but are convinced of marijuana’s health benefits.

You wear a ribbon to fight disease.

You think marriage is an outdated institution, except for gays.

You believe free enterprise is the cause of poverty.

You love helping the poor with other people’s tax dollars.

You are convinced we need to follow the lead of Canada and Europe to make America great.

You ever said, &$147;That Maxine Waters is pretty bright.”

You support limits on carbon emissions but oppose carbon-free nuclear power plants.

You want to ban Wal-Mart but want more marijuana dispensaries.

You believe California is really Mexican territory anyway.

You think ACORN rallies are patriotic, but tea parties are racist.

You still think Obama is doing a great job.

You, too, get a thrill up your leg.

You think Keith Olbermann is a solid journalist.

You are certain anyone with more money than you must have obtained it dishonestly.

You think Barney Frank is kinda cute because he talks like Sylvester the Cat (“Sufferin’ Succotash”).

You are convinced people who die owe their estate to the government, not their families.

You would live in a tree to save it, but you fully support abortion.

You abhor racial stereotypes, but think the NRA is mostly a bunch of ignorant, white rednecks.

You supported the Million Man March, but think town hall protesters are un-American.

You really believe Obama never heard anything controversial in church.

You are very troubled by how we are viewed by the French.

You champion freedom of the arts but want to ban nativity scenes.

You are one of the dozens of people who still watch MSNBC.

Obamacare: The Musical!

Coming soon to a theater near you!

Hitler on Obama

If Hitler had known Obama...

Obama’s Beer Summit

Well, I have to hand it to President Obama, getting two such diverse men as Professor Henry Gates and police Sgt. James Crowley to sit down over a beer and discuss ways of resolving their differences (even if Joe Biden did crash the party).

This leads me to think that perhaps the leader of the Free World just may be on to something. Just imagine...

Sen. Barbara Boxer, Meet Dr. Evil

A Modest Immigration Proposal (With Apologies to Jonathan Swift)

It seems to me that we may be overthinking the entire immigration question. The very problems and issues confronting America suggest a solution amicable to all parties. Let us more closely examine the issue.

On one hand are those who favor open borders, amnesty and a path to citizenship. Many of these are the would-be immigrants themselves and their home countries.

The governments of those people are unable or unwilling to provide the simplest services or economic opportunities for their people. To do so, would mean the dictators and oligarchs that rule would have to curb their own corruption and even permit the underclass a voice in their ruling circles. This is intolerable because it would necessarily mean such adverse concepts as accountability, power sharing and a fewer dollars pouring into their pockets or off-shore accounts.

Yet to forcibly crack down on those seeking economic and political reform is to risk armed revolt. Even if the existing order were to retain control, it would cost money and might even put some of the oligarchs in physical danger.

So, they must seek a third path.

That is emigration for the opportunity seekers. They facilitate the movement of these elements into the United States via a variety of mechanisms. Mexico’s government-funded Grupo Beta aids would-be immigrants in a variety of ways, including issuing publications on how to cross the Mexican-American border in safety.

In addition, the Mexican government, through its consulate in the United States, issues Matricular Consular identification cards, whether in the U.S. legally or not, as an official identification that is recognized by various commercial group on the American side of the border, thus bypassing the inconvenient obstacle of having legal status to obtain other documents required for such things as housing, banking and the like that encumber U.S. citizens and legal aliens.

The immigrants themselves of course are anxious to flee intolerable conditions in their own countries. Often the mantra is heard that these immigrants do the work Americans refuse to do.

That is not quite accurate. What they are doing is working for wages and conditions that Americans would refuse, largely because those salaries and conditions are illegal. However, as oppressive as these conditions seem to an American, they are still many times better than those allowed by the corrupt oligarchs in their home countries.

So, we see on the other side of the border governments that are happy to export their working class so they may hold on to their privileges, and the workers themselves who may obtain a standard of living far above what they could expect in their homeland.

On this side of the border is an unusual alliance of capital and labor, Republicans and Democrats.

Capital is delighted at the prospect of a workforce that is satisfied with sub-minimum wage salaries, no benefits, no workplace rights and nowhere to complain about working conditions. This means an increase in the bottom line for capital, thus satisfying both management and the stockholders. Consumers are also delighted in that prices are kept low.

Organized labor is also happy with the situation. This glut of cheap labor depresses wages across the board for all workers. As American workers become more dissatisfied and insecure, they turn to organized labor to protect their jobs and salaries.

The unions gain strength and influence so long as the migrants pose a threat to legitimate workers.

Both major political parties also stand to gain from the status quo.

Democrats see their voter rolls grow, as they are perceived as defending yet another downtrodden minority, while their coffers swell with contributions from organized labor, ethnic hucksters and liberal celebrities anxious to prove that they actually matter outside the fantasy world of entertainment.

Republicans also see a more energized voting base as unrestrained immigration brings increased crime, lowers property values and overwhelms social services. The GOP’s coffers bloat with contributions from business interests that rejoice they have found a workforce that actively seeks semi-slavery status.

Herein are the seeds of a solution amenable to all parties. This is a solution that will prove to be even more beneficial to the interests of the home countries, organized labor, capital, Democrats and Republicans than the status quo.

I propose the United States revive the practice of indentured servitude.

Different from involuntary servitude (more commonly known as “slavery”), indentured servitude is a voluntary condition. One party offers labor for a certain period of time, generally seven years, and a second party offers to purchase the indenture, or contract. Upon conclusion of the contract, the indentured party becomes a U.S. citizen.

This concept will be a boon to the home countries of the indentured servants. Presently, undocumented immigrants send much of their meager salaries back to family in the home country. This infusion of hard American currency is welcome by these countries as it trickles through their crippled economy and finds its ways into the hands of various government officials through bribery and other means.

But under the indentured servitude system, the home countries can directly sell the labor contracts to American concerns. That way, the home country government pockets the entire fee, rather than skimming a meager percentage as it filters through their economy.

Not only do they export their surplus labor and reduce domestic would-be reformers, they also stand to gain a financial windfall.

American capital will also be delighted with this solution. Rather than expensive negotiations with each individual employee or union, the employer simply purchases the labor outright. Obviously, there will be the expense of housing and feeding this labor, but it will certainly be cheaper than the present situation; Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, Ariz., has solved this problem.

Also, should it be necessary to cut the workforce, capital can sell the labor to the highest bidder. Under the present system, the company gains nothing by laying off an employee except for saved future salary and benefits. Under bonded indenture, the company actually stands to make money by the sale of surplus labor.

At first blush, it is tempting to believe the organized labor might oppose such a program. However, I believe that even they stand to gain significant benefits from bonded indenture. Consider that the unions themselves are free purchase any number of labor contracts. They can then resell these contracts for whatever the market can bear.

What is equally important is that they could simply hold the contracts off the market entirely, thus creating a labor shortage. This, in turn, would lead to an increased demand for non-indentured labor, which the unions would supply from their membership rolls. More union members working means more money flowing in to the unions’ pension plans through mandatory dues.

So, organized labor also benefits from the indentured servitude system.

The Democrat Party would also find the plan acceptable for a variety of reasons. First, is the plan offers the clear-cut path to citizenship that the Democrats have sought for so long. Since most of these new citizens will come from non-European societies, the Democrats can parley their racial grievance skills into recruiting new voters. After all, the newly enfranchised workers will be lacking immediate employment and thus will be anxious for government-financed subsidies in housing, education and health care.

Republicans will also delight in the solution. Bonded indenture means it will be much easier to keep track of foreigners within our borders, so a major security issue is resolved. The benefits to business will stimulate the economy. As profits increase, the stock market will respond accordingly. Consumers will be delighted that prices are kept low, thanks to lowered production costs. Also, with government no longer being responsible the health or education of the undocumented, the public will see an easing of the strain on public services and infrastructure

I offer my modest proposal, not in the hope of any personal gain, but in the sincere desire to resolve this rancorous issue that has proven so divisive to our society. I trust that sanity will prevail and see indentured servitude enacted as the law of the land.

Thousands Protest Global Warming

Change We Can Believe In

Well, what do you expect from a political movement whose slogan ends with a preposition?



For the more mature...

What Progressive Sense of Humor?

Progressives have no problem making fun of their enemies, but like schoolyard bullies, they are the first to complain when they are the target.

The latest incident involved a Saturday Night Live skit poking fun at New York Gov. David Paterson who is blind.

Paterson himself denounced it as a “third-grade depiction of people and the way they look.”

I don't recall the governor denouncing the SNL depiction of Gov. Sarah Palin (which I, a Palin supporter, personally thought was hilarious).

This is the second time recently that Saturday Night Live has fallen afoul of progressive fascists.

Back in October, SNL came under severe fire from the left for a skit they did on the federal bail-out package that satirized such progressive icons as George Soros, Herbert and Marion Sandler, Rep. Barney Frank and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

The skit was yanked from YouTube and a sanitized version later posted.

It seems the same thing is happening now with the Paterson skit, which has been removed from the site with the explanation, “This video is no longer available due to a copyright claim by NBC Universal.”

Both Marxists and their National Socialist cousins believe that all art must serve a political purpose. Their inheritors in the American progressive movement seem to have taken that doctrine to heart.

Gun Safety and Natural Selection

I'm a strong supporter of the Second Amendment. I'm also a believer in Natural Selection. Here's one reason why.